red gold ripple of the sun going down
line of black hills makes my bed
sky full of love pulled over my head
world of wonders . . . *
a Jay walking |
This morning I checked out my emails and the first thing I saw was an advert claiming to teach you how to become "Bankrupt in 3 easy lessons". It used to be a coat of shame, now it's a badge of honour. Switched on modern students know how to get rid of the shackles of debt . . .
Just before that I woke as usual on a Saturday to Farming Today on Radio 4. As usual, I was intermittently mentally tuning in and out - after all, I don't properly wake up for another 2 hours. Today they went on at length about the "carbon footprint" of growing potatoes. Although I wasn't really listening, I did wonder how many 25%s were involved (you had to be there - try iPlayer). Anyway, a few hours later Mrs Dave brought the subject up. Evidently a friend of hers has a grandchild and he is interested in tractors (as very young children seem to be) so they went for a chat with the farmer who owns a field behind their house.
Interlude:
As we drove back from Cornwall last year, we passed Stonehenge and were surprised that despite the dark, tractors were working - seemingly bringing the Harvest home. . .
Back to today:
Mrs Dave's friend became a little concerned during the conversation with Farmer Giles that "nobody seems to be driving the tractor."
"Arr . . . that be because I control it from my laptop here."
Essentially, loads of tractors nowadays are controlled by satellite so the buggers don't have to pay NH contributions or anything - they run remote controlled tractors that don't have lunch breaks or holidays. What's going on? We're back in that Science Fiction World I mentioned before - am I the last to know this? Are you all going to raise your eyebrows to the sky saying, "Oh for god's sake - didn't you know that?"
Not only this, but Mrs Dave also informed me that she no longer gets affected (in a hay fever way) by the fields of rape because they now use a "sterile" type of rape (no jokes,please). So, isn't that genetically modified then? I thought that was banned. I'm so innocent (naive?)
For the first time ever (well, in the 30 odd years I've lived here) as I drove back from Sainsbury's I saw a Jay fly down onto the road and strut about. Wonderful, a genuine example of Jay-walking if ever there was one. This was definitely the highlight of the day for me.
Oh well, just thought I'd touch base before I finally go to Skye - the trip I've planned for ages. Back next weekend - unless there's some form of wiffy (wifi) to allow me to connect with the world, but as even compasses don't work there, I somehow doubt it.
Hmm, this post seems to have been sponsored by the makers of brackets . . .
* thank you Bruce Cockburn - mad Canadian political christian et al
2 comments:
Driverless tractors!? How on Earth are they going kill off characters in The Archers now? They can't all topple off tall ancestral homes.
Verification = Frucks. I'm shocked and amused.
Speaking as one who leaps for the "off" button as soon as the "Rumpty Tumpty Tumpty Tum" theme music starts - I really don't give a flying one. However, perhaps they could all catch scabies or something. Or something worse.
Anyway, "Frucks" IS interesting. It sounds like it involves a banana and a . . . oops,keep it to yourself . . .
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