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| Gordon "Jasper" Sumner |
Whilst I don't intend to have a go at the poor old chap - I'll leave that to Richard Thompson who has a song about him on Dream Attic (Here Comes Geordie) - but honestly, he does come over as a bit of a . . . I am reminded of the comment the great Stuart Maconie made about him. I think it was in Pies and Prejudice (any of his books are well worth a read) where he recounts the "story" of how he got his nickname. Now, according to yer man himself, he used to wear a black and yellow striped jumper to school. Hence the nickname. Now, as Stuart reminds us, most people are more unkind when handing out nicknames - especially kids - and they would more likely have named him "Waspy" or "Buzz" or somesuch.
If he'd been at my old alma mater he'd have been called "Jasper" No, I don't know why either, but that's the old Stevenage term for a wasp in the early 1970s.
Anyhow, he always comes across a bit earnest to me. Again, if he was at school with me I wonder what his reports would have said? Whereas mine tended towards "Satis" - brief, to the point and I must have been obviously less than impressive as old Romper Williams couldn't even be bothered to waste much ink on me by finishing the word - or occasionally "could try harder". I bet Jasper's would have been, "Needs to relax, tries too hard".
Meanwhile, back in the kitchen. Mrs Dave is making the Christmas cake - the usual Nigella Lawson one with Tia Maria that has become traditional here (well, for about three years running). That means "Christmas music" is on the Bose. So unusually for Mrs D it's not Now That's What I Call Christmas it's old Buzz Lightweight's If On A Winter's Night . . . which is a little bit upmarket. I mean, it's on Deutsche Grammophon like his lute albums. Fancy old DG releasing an album with Message In A Bottle played on a lute - I kid you not.
Did you know that an average pint of bitter - say 3.8% abv - contains 182 calories and would take a man 30 minutes to walk it off whereas a lady of the opposite gender would take 40 minutes? A traditional full English breakfast is estimated 807 calories and whilst I should take 2 hours and 20 minutes to walk it off, Mrs Dave would need another 20 minutes walking. It's a good thing we grilled ours today and had scrambled rather than fried eggs. Especially as I can't be bothered to go out for a walk. Still, here's the big one. A Christmas dinner with all its trimmings with a side order of mince pies, chocolate log and pudding is estimated at a colossal 3200 calories. A man would walk that off after 9 hours and 20 minutes whilst a lady would have to keep going for 11 hours and 10 minutes. So I suggest giving your partners a head start.
You could always have a glass or two of beer and a fry up while you're waiting before you go to catch her up.
9 comments:
Are them Bose things any good? I always heard they were a triumph of marketing over reality, but I'd be interested to hear different.
Mike
I like it - it was a surprise Christmas/birthday present about 2 years ago. I like it although we only use it in the kitchen so we're probably not getting our complete money's worth. However, everyone is always very complementary about the sound.
Although, of course maybe they're just being polite. Perhaps other followers would be so kind as to comment?
It can go bloody loud though - pisses the neighbours off in the Summer when we spend more time in the garden!!
Interesting, I'm in the market for precisely a kitchen music player that won't take up too much space -- I'm mainly in the mood for music at the time I'm cooking and/or washing up, but our venerable Sony CD/tape has gone all wobbly.
Is there a technical reason why digital radios (ptah!) never have CD players built in? It's very odd.
Mike
Well, Mike, at a current price of £599 (including DAB radio) it may be a little expensive for a kitchen music player. We somehow have ended up with the kitchen being the only place for it to be - we rarely use the front room except for occasional tv/film viewing and the back room has the computer with a fairly good speaker system. Oh and lots of guitars, of course!
There are alternatives - try checking it out in-store, you have a John Lewis in Southampton.
In all honesty, it is a rather expensive way of listening to R4 in the mornings but it does come into its own when we have guests.
As I said, I like having it but I probably wouldn't have actually spent that amount of money on it. It was a very welcome gift from a very generous lady!
£599?? No wonder they never put the prices on those adverts...
What the world needs is a top-quality, small footprint CD/radio, preferably waterproof, under £200.
Mike
Mike, not sure about waterproof but Roberts do a neat(as in compact) CD/DAB/FM player which they call the MP43.I reckon it is pretty damn good and have no regrets in buying one. They are around the £230 mark in John Lewis but I am sure Amazon would do it for a better price. Highly recommended as they say.
Oh, it also has a facility to play an Ipod.
Thanks, Andy, I'll check it out. I don't think there's ever been a waterproof, wipe-down kitchen radio, but there should have been!
Mike
Well, I do happen to have a waterproof CD player/radio in our bathroom. The radio isn't digital - mind you it doesn't work well around these parts (neither do DABs etc - reception is crap, the ONLY reason why we have SKY). But I can listen to music whilst . . .er, well, doing the things one does in bathrooms.
It was about twenty quid but we've had it for about 5 years.
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