Saturday, 15 January 2011

the home service

Interestingly, I wrote my last post in a slight haze of some sort of malaise that has been hanging around for a few days. I've had a child rush out of my class to throw up; I went home early because I felt so awful on Friday and generally, I think this must be the worst start to a new half term I've ever known - so many teachers and students ill. Also, I had decided to have a glass or two of whisky for "medicinal purposes".  I was surprised when I re-read it that it actually made some sort of sense.

I did, however, miss out a huge chunk of information, especially about the rather wonderful one-off album released called Dransfield.  I didn't mention that Barry has a brother called Robin - oh, I'll sort it out later. . .

I went to my school's Christmas do last night.  I'm not sure if it was an early 2011 one or a late 2010 one, but it was the first one I'd ever been to and I've worked at this school for about 10 years.  I don't think I'll bother next year.  It was at Ipswich Town Football Club and I HAVE been there for meals before.  Generally the food isn't very good - £30 a head for catering food isn't really worth it. Still, we went and had a reasonably good time - there were, I'm sure, a few hangovers to be proud of this morning.  We came home early and I was the model of restraint and did not drink too much - possibly the sign of me growing up after 55 years - or, simply not feeling up to it. Dressed up in a suit with a bow tie, it all made me feel a bit James Bondish.  Well, if Bond was played by Wilfred Brambles.

Anyway, after a rather crappy meal I felt that I needed to get some decent meat for the weekend.  I popped up to our local butcher and bought some lamb steaks for tonight and a joint of beef for Sunday.  An old lady asked for a joint of beef - "I'd like it well hung". Now, full marks to the butcher for not stating the obvious.  There's no way I could have resisted it! Hence the postcard - crude but still funny. My favourite seaside postcard was of two old people complaining to a department store about a toilet brush - " we've decided to go back to using paper".  Excellent.

We're often told that there's no such thing as a free lunch.  This could be true but occasionally there are free things available.  In the interests of a better world I notice that some energy saving products are available for free.  These may not have come to anyone's attention so make no apology for mentioning them here.  If you go here you can get an energy saving plug and a, ahem, "water widget" that could save water (and therefore you some money) and these are both totally free - not even postage and packing as long as you use the "promotional code" Radio Times, you can get these items free. There, what a wonderful citizen I've turned out to be. The offer ends in March.

Oh, and whilst I'm talking of free stuff - let's think about those avaricious bastards that are ripping us off left, right and centre - please spare a few moments to watch this.

This has been the Home Service, good night.


Andy Wright said...

Hi Dave,
I like your post very much. ( and are you going to change the 'naughty post card on a regular basis? I hope so.... 'oooh Matron!')
I particularly endorse your comments in relation to the 'avaricious bastards' that claim the millions that we (and several countries in the developing world could only dream of). I detest them all. After watching the appalling weasel and Barclay's Chief Executive Bob Diamond's (what a highly appropriate surname)appearance before the Treasury Select Committee last week the words of 'Show of Hands' have even more resonance. What a brilliant song. Vive La Revolution!

Dave Leeke said...

Hi Andy - are you referring to the fact that I changed the original "saucy postcard"? If so, I assume you saw it before you took the dogs for a walk - I contemplated it for ages (surely I have more important things to worry about!!). I thought the original one far too obvious (and modern). I like the milkman's expression and to be honest, earlier postcards are far more subtle (if that's the right word!).

So, no, I won't keep changing them but the early bird catches the worm etc . . .

Dave Leeke said...

While I'm at it, please check out "Roots" by Show of Hands too (Kent, if you're following this, it's not Anti-American but Pro-British but certainly not in any fascistic way). I love the line "It's my flag too and I want it back".

Even my kids are enjoying SOH. The messages are getting through.

Kent Wiley said...

Effing Blogger. Second time at least that it's not published my comment after a fairly lengthy editorial span. Luckily I was able to save it and will try again in another moment. GRRRR!

Kent Wiley said...

Dave, the comment that I really want to leave, Blogger won't publish for me (I don't think, as far as I can tell), after three or four attempts. I give up! What's your email? I'll send it to you and you can post it if you want.

Double Damn!